ELK & THURSTON

[Anonymous]

WHAT IS A TRIP REPORT WITHOUT SOME CONTROVERSY?

Elk & Thurston:

Today’s quote: “Always borrow money from a pessimist. They will not expect it back!”

Wednesday’s ‘B’ hike, which for the purpose of our ‘C’ hikers is a true B hike called Elk & Thurston. Not like our Wednesday ‘C’ hikers that put a wrong label on their hike to make them look stronger, faster and more purposeful than their fellow ‘B’ hikers. I mean really, how can you label a mountain called Cloudburst a ‘C’ hike and think it is more difficult than the scheduled ‘B’ hike? Just the name ‘Cloudburst’ sounds like some soft fluffy thing blowing by in the sky. It should belong in the ‘milk runs’ on Blackcomb ski hill which has names like Jersey Cream and are categorized as green runs, or otherwise the simplest you can do. At best an ‘A’ hike.

Elk & Thurston sounds like it has purpose and challenges that only the weak will fail. Of course none of the nine members failed in any form or manner this past Wednesday. They stepped up to the challenge in the high 20 degree temperatures and overcame the difficulties to conquer mother nature at her best. No matter what obstacles she threw at them/us/me the united group grit their teeth and acted as a team to ‘break on through to the other side’ (some door knob should write a song with that title) of pain and glory.

Being more specific, Puffburst has a listed ascent time of 2-2.5 hours according to Matt Gunn book ‘Scrambles’ vs. Elk & Thurston that takes some 3 to 4 hours. Secondly the elevation gain for Puffburst is 751 m vs. 996 m as well as average grade is steeper. How can this be listed as a ‘C’ hike? What were they thinking unless they just wanted to be ‘C’ snobs towards us less serious more fun loving Wednesday ‘B’ hikers? I must recruit Elliot Ness to investigate a another possible NSH crime.

Adding salt to the wound was NSH Boss Lady sent a new hiker to join the ‘C’ hikers when this person had not done a ‘B’ hike yet with our club. Do we not have a rule on this issue??? Furthermore, what happened to the ‘C’ hikers on this Puff Climb? They got lost and had to bush whack for the day while being eaten alive by bugs. Nice introduction for the new member considering they could have been out in sunny Chilliwack enjoying the day bug free hiking with past NSH Boss people and CD’s and up and coming members while sharing intellectual chatter on a real ‘B’ hike. No bobbing and weaving with this group, they just march on like the ants by committing to hard team work.

Now it was not like the ‘B’ hikers did not have some controversy issues of their own, just slightly less risky and more significant to mankind. Not to mention they were within all the NSH rules just in case the NSH Boss Lady is reading this blog.

First, the Wednesday Wizard of them all was making some serious statements that alter the facts I had heard from the sleuth of all investigators, Elliot Ness. It was only two weeks ago when some members of this Wednesday hike were out trying to show the Wizard up by breaking the NSH jinx of actually completing the Deeks Loop by following the trail. How novel is that? Anyways, this group of NSH from two weeks ago had Elliot Ness along to act as back up support in case we got as miss guided as the group led by the Wizard earlier this spring, or last fall…..it is tough to get the real facts form the Wizard when they were actually attempting to complete the loop. Already starting to sound kind of doggy is it not?

So, I will give the Wizard credit that whenever he led his flock of NSH Wednesday hikers around Deeks Loop they did make a loop. Just not the right loop unless you want to call getting lost in the woods and having to bush whack your way down hill hopping you would eventually fall onto highway 99 a loop. Congratulations, they did hit the road like a deer at night seeing car lights dazing in their eyes. On the other hand Cam The Ram Man did help get us lost while searching to complete the elusive loop but had the common sense to back up when he knew he was wrong. From there he led the group to the proper trail to successful complete the loop as it was meant to be, on a trail.

The Wizard’s Assistant was there to support the Wizard himself which created some uncomfortable moments for all because everyone knew they had been caught in a plot of inconsistent controversy. Yet, despite the seriousness of what was uncovered the group buried their hatchets in the back of each other’s heads and forged ahead to the summit. Mine you I did have a slight headache after that discussion.

In summary, everyone made it up including two heart victims, and everyone made it down safely in a leisure pace of six hours. Afterwards, half went home to fight the traffic while the other half went back to Chilliwack to enjoy Japanese food at a Korean restaurant…..I know, I know the world is a confusing place. Maybe the next time the so called ‘C’ hikers would like to join us, if they ask nicely!

ps. guess which participant smokes some funny stuff while lessoning to the song “Anything Goes at Alice Restaurant”?

pss NSH Boss Lady, Colombia has an o not a u

[Author]

Posts